Informatika és tudomány

Mondjatok vicceket!


Egy viccnek nincs \"eredeti\", \"jobb\", \"rosszabb\", \"elrontott\", és egyéb hasonló jelzőkkel illetett változata. Változatok vannak, és mindenkinek az az eredeti/legjobb, amit először hallott, így felesleges beszólni azért, mert valaki más egy másik változatot ismer.
  • ollie
    #5652
    How to Lose a Computer in 10 Days

    1. Disable your anti-virus software. Better yet, uninstall it altogether. All it does is protect your computer from becoming infected with a potentially destructive virus.
    2. Do not install the latest security updates for your computer and other software. All they do is fix known security holes.
    3. Open all e-mail attachments. Some stranger has taken the time to send you an e-mail with an attachment. Common courtesy is to open it. Who knows? It may be a great joke.
    4. Share all your folders and files. Make sure you assign everyone full control so you don't have to deal with the hassle of managing a whole bunch of permissions.
    5. Be sure to use a simple password for the Administrator account. How about "password?" And make sure everyone knows what it is. If you have to, write it down on a piece of paper and tape it to your monitor. While you're at it, why not add all users to the Administrators group? Throw the principle of least privilege right out the door.
    6. Install Kazaa as soon as possible to download all the spyware. The more spyware, the better.
    7. If your computer is connected to the Internet, do not use a firewall. All it does is protect your computer from unsolicited traffic. Why not just leave the door wide open for everyone?
    8. However, if you insist on using a firewall, make sure you open all your ports.
    9. Configure your computer to show hidden files. If you do not recognize a file on your computer, just delete it. You probably don't need it anyway.
    10. And finally, never ever lock your computer. What happens if someone needs access to it when you aren't around?